We belong to Allah & to Him we shall return.
I am seated on the train on my way back from my aunt’s (her mum was my maternal grandpa’s twin) burial… When I returned to London (1st time since my parents took me to Nigeria at about 5 years old) so many years ago, my aunty insisted my siblings & I cometo her house at weekends so she could keep up with our well being; in the process I got to know her children (my cousins) …
Of course, over the years we all grew up & life got in the way of maintaining regular contact …
The last time I saw my aunty was more than 4 years ago (I visited her in an an old people’s home) while here on my annual summer holiday to London (I had taken up employment outside UK at the time) …
Yesterday, I told my daughter I would attending my aunt’s burial & my daughter asked if she knew my aunt; I told my daughter that when I gave birth to her (more than 25 years ago); aunty & her husband (Uncle Issa – may his soul rest in peace) came to our temporary accomodation on the day I was discharged from hospital & uncle called the athan in her ears.
I stood at my aunty’s graveside today & watched her coffin lowered into the ground & gosh; once again it struck me (as it always does, when I witness a body being buried) that our main purpose in life is to prepare for that day when we finally leave this world; all her children were by her graveside, friends & other family members as well, but she was buried alone & with none of the worldly things she had acquired in her lifetime. Attendance of this burial (as with others) has once again put things into perspective for me; & reminds me of Allah’s awesomeness – reflection mode as I type this up!
After aunty’s body was laid to rest; we then went to uncle’s grave (in the same cemetary) and reminiscenced about them both.
I hadnt seen or spoken to any of aunty’s children (my cousins) in more than 10 years! Some of them didn’t even recognise me. One of them asked after my mum & said the last time she saw my mum was when she (my cousin) gave birth to her baby boy (who by the way will be 20 this year – same age as my son) & my mum had given her baby the traditional African bath & thrown her baby up. Her son & all my other cousins’ children, were at the graveside; all taller than their parents and I; my daughter & son would of course not remember my cousins whom they probably last saw when they were under 10 years old nor would they know any of their children!
I told my cousins as I was leaving; that we had to do better; aunty was the last chain holding us together & with her now gone we shouldn’t let go the kinship our parents tried so hard to maintain – our children should know one another for instance ….
Hopefully we would work on it …
Rest in peace Salima Adeniji (omo Mogaji)..